Thanks for all the awesome (and by that I might mean awesomely-horrifying) misadventures you sent in. I had a really hard time choosing, but this one was just too bizarre.
Behold, Larissa's Date From Weirdo-land:
If the sign of a good date is gathering many-a-tale to tell for the rest of your existence, then this pitiful specimen would be in luck, however, he instead wins the official title of "worst date of my life." Let me share with you his ten-step recipe for disaster:
1. He arrived an hour and a half late (knowing I had other plans promptly after our brief date)
2. He carries a "murse" - aka "man purse" that is no satchel, no over-sized wallet, no purse even - it is a double-layered plastic Walmart bag
3. We got halfway to our destination and he got sick, so he pulled over to lay down at a gas station without telling me what we were doing or why - he just pulled in and threw his seat back.
4. Despite his illness, he was still convinced we were going through with the date. After about 6 attempts I finally convinced him to take me home instead of his original plan.
5. His original plan was for racquetball and a wedding reception in a town an hour away (for a first date?!?!?)
6. He SNIFFED me - a deep, long, purposefully exaggerated inhaling of my aura kinda sniff
7. He kept feigning anxiety, telling me I make him very nervous but that the one thing that would make it better is a hug, which led to aforementioned sniff
8. Since he was feeling so ill, I offered to let him rest on my couch until he felt well enough to make the 45-minute drive home. Why did I do that? He opted to rest and requested watching "Nacho Libre." Really - wow, he knows how to impress a girl...or not.
9. His name may or may not have been "Sherman." And he may or may not have had a "the third" at the end of his name. Ouch.
10. The worst part? One of my best friends was interested in him and has refused to talk to me in the two years since this happened.
Ohhh Larissa. Thank you so much for sharing. We're sorry you had to have this experience, but hot damn! It makes for a great story.
And don't worry, other misadventure submitters-- I'm saving yours! So stay tuned.
Have a great weekend, rockin' readers! And speaking of rockin', I will be spending my weekend {here}.
Yeehaw!!!
ohy my gosh, i'm a day late on your bad date tales. try this one: http://justlikemarypoppins.blogspot.com/2009/08/false-advertising.html
ReplyDeletestill haunted.
Lol. Thanks so much for the honor! What a way to brighten a gal's day than by sharing dating horror stories with the ladies!
ReplyDeleteWait a minute. I know a Sherman. I know a Sherman with a III attached to the end of his name too. Could it be the same? Does his last name begin with an O?
ReplyDeleteAce - if this sounds like something your O-man would do, then it is absolutely him. If it doesn't, then nope, absolutely not him;-)
ReplyDelete