Saturday, December 25, 2010

Dating story #27, a very un-silent night.

Merry Christmas, Pretties!

I am currently en route to the City of Angels and, thanks to modern technology, my flight has interwebs! That's pretty fantastic, as now I can recount the tales of last night.

'Twas the night before Christmas
As I donned high heel shoes
To go out on the town
Like any good Jew
If you'd told me of this merriment
I would not believe
Yet it seems the night before Christmas
Is the new New Year's Eve!

During the day yesterday, I met up with my awesome trainer-friend [triend?] Car for one last ass-kicking before I go eat my face off in LA.  As we had our weekly boy recap, we talked about plans for the night.  I told her that SoCal had wanted to meet up before I left, but the Chef had also been steadily [but not overwhelmingly] texting me about coming by his west village restaurant to have some drinks and food at the bar.  So CH decided to join me for phase #1 of the night and then we'd move on to the LES to meet up with a boy she's been dealing with and I figured at that point, SoCal would be ready to meet up as well.  I also guessed it would be the perfect opportunity to get to know the Chef a little better but would be able to leave him at his restaurant [working] and meet up with SoCal later on.
So, we got to the adorable, sexy Betel (pronounced "Beetle") and got comfy at the bar, which had a whole slew of merry diners already seated at it.  As it turns out, they weren't just regular diners, but the restaurant's [primarily Australian] INVESTORS and OWNERS [and a few hussies along with them], who insisted Car and I scoot down and join them. The Chef then came out to say hello and, I must say, he was way cuter than I remembered.  It must've been his "disco sherlock holmes" getup from the first meeting that threw me off, but he's borderline HOT!  I'm not usually a fan of blondes, but he has wavy, shaggy, surfer-esque locks, blue eyes and a pretty nice physique. AND, this time I could also see the large tattoo on his forearm, which gave him an edge that I find pretty sexy.  Let the games begin!  And by "games" I mean: free cocktails, free food, festive music and basically the equivalent of a crazy private party with wild Aussies and resto staff that we were lucky enough to just happen upon.  Car and I seem to get into these random, fun situations together and we are pretty excellent wing-women.  
One of the Aussie owners who looked insanely similar to Stanley Tucci was very much a fan of ours.  But, as he observed my sporadic interactions with The Chef, he proclaimed across the table to me: "I think he LIKES you!"  Yeah, thanks Nancy Drew but it's pretty freakin' obvious at this point.  And when I went to the restroom, Car txted me that Aussie Stanley Tucci also confessed to liking me and apparently said "This should be interesting!" Um, the only thing interesting there is that I have zero interest in you, Stanley, so move aside.  I have a chew toy courting me!  Sidebar:  Yes, the Chef is 25. And yes, I have sworn off chewys and have recently done a very good job [patting self on back] of sticking to that rule.  But I must say, this boy is an old soul.  There's something very different about him and something, dare I say, more mature than most of the 30+ guys I know.  
The party was in full swing, and the boys were shutting down the kitchen seeing as the place was totally devoid of anyone but staff or friends, and Car and I thought this might be our time to bust a move.  I had received a text from SoCal that just said "Babe." Hmm...that sounds kinda un-sober! [And, accurate.]  So I went to the bathroom to re-spackle a bit and prep to move on.  I also texted the Chef to come meet me in the sexy bathroom hallway so I could tell him goodbye...and maybe have a little lip-action. He totally choked. I gave him every look, every opportunity, but he did not complete the transaction. Oh well.

I then got another text from SoCal that he was at a bar on the Upper East side [blech. not going there!]  
But Car and I figured if he wanted to see me, he could meet us wherever we ended up. So we prepared to leave.  And then, halfway into our coats, wondered WHY the hell we would leave a place with a) crazy people b) unlimited, free Veuve Clicquot.  So we removed our jackets and stayed.  The Chef then realized he needed to up his game or lose me to some crazy [non-Tucci] Aussie, so he asked if I wanted to go into a room I had earlier named "The Vulva Room" due to it's amazingly vaj-looking light fixture.  So, I obliged and homeboy FINALLY made his move.  Not bad, yet still, a little too much teeth and not enough tongue.  I think I'm going to have to start a "Kissing Workshop" and make it mandatory for all men to attend.  But he's pretty adorable. And, told me several times that I'm "f*cking gorgeous," which is pretty lovely to hear.  
For your reference.
After awhile, the party took a weird turn.  And by that I mean I looked at the bar and there was a girl lying atop it, prepping to have a spring-break style "Body shot" done off of her. Classy!

So the Chef, Car and I decided to bounce in search of food and Car's boy toy. The Chef also told me how much he wanted to cook for me, and he thought he should cook me breakfast this morning.  Bold move, and I know it probably sounds dirty or presumptuous, but it was actually just really sweet the way he said it.  Not to mention I've never been involved with someone like this and the idea of a man cooking for me is incredibly sexy for some reason!  So, I let him.  [OBVI!]  He was a perfect gentleman slumber-mate and he managed to rummage through my [currently frat-boy esque] refrigerator and whip up an INSANE and gourmet breakfast for me.  Hot. Diggity. Damn! 
Merry Christmas to ME!

What ever happened to SoCal, you ask?  Well apparently he also had several libations and passed out.  Ya snooze ya lose, sugarl!  See you in 2011, buddy.  He did say he wants to see me as soon as I get back.  We'll see if 8 days away changes that. In fact, I'm quite interested to see how many of the guys in the current line-up will still be around when I return.  Guess we'll just have to wait and see!
In the meantime, crazy serial dating Lindsey could probably use this nice escape to LA-la land and some much-needed time with bestie Jendel.  And who knows? Maybe I'll even get some actual SLEEP!  
More to come from the west coast.  And how about you?  Was your Christmas NICE or NAUGHTY



  1. When I was single I also had a rotation...I liked to at least have eight in with the bottom four moving up only if they did something crazy wonderful (I admit sometimes they were place holders) or one of the top 4 moved down or out. It really kept me breezy during some rough patches with my now husband. I admit it can be quite tiring BUT worth it in the end.

  2. Laurel, I HEART you. You just killed with that. Amazing AND correct.